Hey Everyone! I know it’s been a little while but I have been adjusting to my new normal, Motherhood which really should be called, Who wants to work for Baby J?
The boss, Baby J
Baby J came into this world on the first day of the New Year and she has been very demanding since day one. Let me let you in on a little secret, motherhood is the hardest role I’ve ever have to fill in my entire life. No matter how many books you read or advice you get from professionals, family and friends all of that shit goes out the window when you have a living breathing human hollering at 3 am in your ear whose diaper has been changed and they’ve already been fed.
I would be lying to you if I told you the first few weeks were easy. Total opposite! I cried every day the first week I was home from the hospital because I felt like I couldn’t do anything right.
After having a C-section and being in pain for the first two weeks, I felt inadequate because I’m so independent and wasn’t comfortable having others do things for me. I questioned my womanhood because I was unable to breastfeed like I had planned to. The sleepless nights had me looking like who shot ya. Overall, I was looking for a label I could stick on baby J’s butt so I could return to sender, the hospital, a stork anybody!
But after I asked for help from my parents and expressed how I was feeling to family and friends the outpouring of support has been tremendous! My village rocks and have helped in more ways I could have possibly imagined. I forgot to mention that while I’m on maternity leave trying to bond and figure out motherhood, I’m also trying to move into my first house. And that process has also been challenging and a long time coming.
Slowly but surely I’m learning the do’s and dont’s of parenting. For example the people who say sleep when the baby sleeps. That sounds good in all but when am I suppose to wash clothes, bottles, my rear end or do anything else productive if I don’t do it when she’s sleeping? Also, people who say it gets easier as they get older. Really? As they get older they start sleeping less during the day and if your baby is like mine and likes to cuddle then you find yourself holding her to try to soothe and comfort her for longer than you planned.
But I’m not complaining because when I look at her as she’s quietly sleeping for longer than two hours, I say to myself, “I’m so in love with this little girl!” So pray for me and Baby J while we are on this journey and thank you to those who’ve encouraged me along the way.
If you would like to view a slide show below of Baby J’s birth announcement created by First day photo, click on the video below.
Until next time!