Hey everyone, I hope you’re ready for Christmas because it is rapidly approaching and will be here before you know it. I’m 11 months in to parenting Jordy B and it has been the most challenging experience I will never forget. I’ve managed to lock her in the car while the keys were locked in my trunk outside of the doctor’s office. Jordy B has managed to fall off the bed twice. I’ve allowed her to sleep a few nights in her pack and play and take a few naps in her crib. She’s probably eaten a few things off the floor that she shouldn’t have had. But all in all, we’re surviving and taking things one day at a time.
This single parenting experience has not been a walk in the park. I think having to care for and take care of this little person who solely relies on me for EVERYTHING has been the hardest adjustment. I’ve been single for thirty seven years and had a lot of freedom. But to have to give that up to take care of the best blessing has also been an internal struggle but one that I will never take for granted and wouldn’t change for the world.
The single most difficult thing I’ve had to deal with is Jordy B not having a relationship with her father. I know how important it is for a girl to have her father around especially because of the relationship I’ve had with my Dad. Her Father has seen her a few times but it will never replace him missing out on a series of firsts she’s experienced these last few months. It is my hope that he will realize the importance of having a relationship with her and make a better effort in the future.
On the other hand, the thing that brings me the most joy is seeing the relationship she has with my Dad. Even though her father has not been present, my Dad has shown her more love than I ever imagined. He’s so surprisingly gentle and protective of her I find myself laughing at the two of them and even when I think about it. The bond that they share will be one that I will ensure she never forgets.
Recently, I went to a brunch with some of my Baylor friends who have children around the same age. While we were eating someone asked, What was the most important thing you wish someone would have told you before having children? One Soror responded I wish I would have known how much support I would’ve needed. At that moment I wanted to reach across the table and give her two high fives and shout Hallelujah from the rooftop of that restaurant but my mouth was full of chicken and waffles so all I did was shake my head in agreement. Because let’s be clear without my parents, siblings, other family members and friends I wouldn’t have kept my sanity or my hair.
When I was pregnant, I never imagined I would need all hands on deck the way that I did but I’m glad they were available to me and Jordy B. I can also recall taking a hospital tour with my Mom and while we were there all of the other women were there with their significant others and I was the only one there with my Mom. When I got back in the car I cried because of the realization that I would be raising Jordy B single handed. Once again my mom was there to reassure me that I had the support of others and God would not put more on me than I can handle, I felt a little more at ease.
Alright everyone, gotta go because I need to finish Christmas shopping and planning Jordy B’s Winter ONEderland birthday party. Until next time….