Has been one for the books! I don’t know about you but the first month of this new year has been one that will go down in HERstory meaning MINE! From celebrating my baby’s third birthday, to watching domestic terrorists storm the Capitol, to breaking up with my man friend, to witnessing Madam Vice President Kamala Harris become the first Black woman to hold the 2nd highest office in the not so United States of America. Whew chile, I’m tired already!
I’ve experienced a lot of emotions during the last 30 days which range from anger, to sadness, to happiness, to heart break. On new year’s eve, I was hopeful about this year being a year in which I experience different things. The first day of the year, I celebrated my whole heart in human form’s 3rd birthday with family and a few friends. I don’t believe in having grand events every birthday and it’s a good thing since this pandemic seems like forever. But I wanted to do a little something special and we did that, with food, fellowship and laughter.
And then there was the insurrection at the Capitol. Need I say more? It was a display of what should’ve never been able to happen in this country by a group of people who were privileged and able to gain access to a place that should’ve been better guarded and protected. I can’t even explain how insurreal it felt to watch it happen in real time. And since we the people like to place blame on a source, I place it on Agent Orange and the bandits at the protest who incited and ignited the crowd to behave in that manner. All I can say is I hope the FBI finds every body responsible for the chaos that ensued which injured many and killed 5 people and put them under the jailhouse.
So I wasn’t going to talk about the end of my relationship with my man friend but for the sake of being transparent, here it is. If you never had the pleasure of experiencing a break up with a partner it’s like experiencing a significant loss. You go through five stages of grief and at times, they overlap. I know that sounds odd but it happens. I’m fortunate enough to have a great support system that allowed me to talk through it and I’m trying to focus on the positive take aways I gained from the relationship.
As a single mom, it took me awhile to start feeling like myself again. I didn’t feel desirable. I was uncertain about things and sometimes lonely. When my man friend and I got together, our relationship fostered and felt more like a friendship. He challenged me to start my business, he encouraged me to do things I had been hesitant about doing and I even invited him to celebrate Thanksgiving with my family. I let my guard down, allowed myself to be vulnerable and open to love and for that I have no regrets. But moving forward, I won’t be sharing pictures of any future men friends until someone puts a ring on it, lol.
On the same day as my break up from my man friend, I was able to witness Madam Vice President Kamala D. Harris become the first black woman to hold the second highest ranking political office in these not so United States. I can’t say that I sat in my living room with my chucks and pearls on but I did watch the entire Inauguration and was most proud when she was sworn in. My sincerest hope is that she and President Joe Biden are able to restore and rebuild America to be a place where people can be SOMEWHAT united (just being realistic)!
An honorable mention moment for January was visiting a black owned winery in Katy, Texas called Erma Rose Winery. One of my long time college friend’s, her mom and my mom got together and sat outside (socially distanced from others, of course), drank wine, ate some BBQ, had some dessert and listened to good music played by a singer/guitarist who sang primarily Prince songs. It was everything I needed. I was able to reconnect with my friend and our mom’s connected, it was a moment I will never forget.
As I was writing this post, I found out Soror Cicely Tyson died. Oh lawd, I can’t take anymore! May she rest in eternal peace and I’ll be praying for her family and everyone affected by her death. I also pray January is not a precursor of what’s to come for the rest of this year. Until next time….